Archive for July 2012

For those of us who have gotten to that stage in life where your parents have started to call you up more often to ask you your romantic status and tell you how important it is to not be too picky, you might be able to relate to this article.

When you get to that point of spinsterhood (yes y’all are spinsters), where you start to give a listening early to every Tom, Dick and Harry; that level where you start considering the things that you would not mind compromising just to get your man, if care is not taken, you will kiss so many frogs that you start to have the “Aftermath Syndrome”. I just came up with this name by the way.

AFTERMATH SYNDROME: This describes that feeling you get after having so many messed up relationships and relationship attempts that you no longer know your true romantic identity.

Still confused? Have you ever been with a guy and you want him to want you back so badly that you no longer know how to act? Suddenly YOU don’t seem worthy? You start to have a series of outer body experiences where you see so many versions of yourself popping out, most of which you don’t even recognise? I bet you didn’t know that there are a whole bunch of girls that go through this too.  I can’t say the say for guys though. They are fundamentally selfish beings and keep going round searching for a girl to accept them just the way they are. I’m not sure this is necessarily the wrong approach as I know for a fact that losing your identity is quite annoying to both you and people around you.

Anyway, how do we cure or at least manage this aftermath syndrome?

1)    You are good enough: You have to keep reminding yourself that you are good enough and that you haven’t met that 1man that was made for you. I’m not encouraging the girls who clearly need a character assessment and make over. I’m talking about those girls whom the whole world, not only them, would meet and wonder “why is she still alone?” You have to keep believing that you are good enough because if you mask who you fundamentally are to please a man, one day you won’t be able to hide your real self. What happens then?

2)    Stay away from people who make you second guess yourself: Everyone has met that one guy that gives us that “I’m not all that” feeling at the pit of our stomachs. Sometimes he does this by just criticising our every move. We start to wonder; am I too fat, not smart enough, not rich enough, not enterprising enough, too dark, like to party too much, not religious enough, too religious? Although a man wanting you to draw closer to God is a great thing, but you have to do it for YOU not for the man. Any man that makes you second guess yourself or gives you a complex is BAD for you. Remove yourself from that bad situation before it destroys you.

3)    Finally, at all times, be the BEST version of yourself you can possibly be. Eat right and stay fit, keep your skin looking fresh and always dress to kill. Look like a million bucks and keep your mind just as sound. Soak yourself in the instructions of God, whether you are Christian or Muslim. Basically, do what is right and what is right will come to you.



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  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, " matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌