Posted on: 28/05/2012

Women are blessed with a natural gift that they are all aware of but they seldom use. No, I don’t mean their physical gift. I mean that gift that makes us good wives and excellent mothers “instinct”. All women were born with the power to discern if a man is right for them or not. Whether or not they decide to acknowledge and use that power is entirely up to them. I had this conversation with a friend of mine this morning, believe it or not, this friend is male. He said women are so blessed they have no idea. What he doesn’t realise is that although its heart breaking the unnecessary pain women go through, some of them could have actually dodged the bullets that end up killing them. What I will never understand it this; what gives you as a woman the impression that you have the power to change a man? I read somewhere once that if a man were to change because of a woman, it would be because he had found a woman who to him is worth changing for and not because she wants him to change. I can totally relate to this analogy.

I’m not saying throw compromise out of the window, but I’m saying be smart, use you instinct. Once upon a time, many many years ago, I dated a guy I knew only wanted to have sex with me and dump me. I gave myself choices; either I date him, give him what he wants and accept the consequences, or find a way to use his wants to my own advantage. I won’t spell out the option I took, but let’s just say that relationship was most tasking 3yrears of my life. The right option would have been to walk away because even though it lasted 3years, it left me with scars that I’d rather not have. What’s my point? Use your instinct my dear sisters. The moment the alarms in your head start going off, take a long walk and don’t look back. It will pay you in the end.

Your man is upset with you and is shouting like the world is about to come down, you look into his eyes and you instantly get scared, don’t walk, run. You have no business with a man you are afraid of. You should respect your man not fear him. There is a difference between being stingy and being thrifty. A man might be careful about the way he spends money because he is not exactly buoyant. If you can deal with that then fine but I don’t know who in her right senses can deal with a stingy person. When a man is stingy even to his own detriment, don’t think that when you become his wife he will change o, because he will only get worse. A man, whether he is rich or not, should aspire to be able to provide the best for his family because they are his pride. Run away from a stingy man, he won’t do you any good.

The signs are always there, listen to them. Are you not tired of crying about broken hearts and failed relationships? It’s not enough to want to have a man in your life. It should be that you want to have the best possible man in your life. When your heart tells you that a relationship will not work, listen to it. Take your time, always follow your instincts they almost never steer you wrong. If you feel a man is bad for you, he probably is. If you feel your man is sneaking around, 9 out of 10 times you are right. If you feel there is a strange way you husband reacts to a particular girl or situation, something is probably up.

I’m not advising you to lose you minds and trail your men or act like lunatics just because you want to prove your point. Deal with things as maturely as possible, ignore the irrelevant ones, but if you are not married to a man and you alarms are on overdrive you need to advise yourself before you wreck yourself.

This article does not refer to those overly paranoid and somewhat mental women o…


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  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, " matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌


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