theheartofmen

Untitled!!!

Posted on: 02/04/2012

I got a few stories and I promise I will publish them ASAP, but in the mean time I decided to share this.

Last night, as I was watching a particularly sad episode of Desperate Housewives something hit me. It really doesn’t end at finding that perfect someone, there are so many things that may happen somewhere along the line that make me wonder if it’s worth the stress people tend to put themselves through. You work so hard at improving yourself to land the man of your dreams. You become an entirely different person because you hear through the grapevine that that’s what he likes. You change your mode of dressing, get a haircut, down play your life style, pick up a new religion and all these for what? Yeah, for a percentage of people it actually works out, they transform into better versions of themselves and live happily ever after. But what about those few that don’t have it so good? The ones who find out that all that glitters is not gold. The ones who never get along with their new in-laws and live in constant misery and horror. The ones who find out that the man is not who they thought he was after all. They get beaten and treated like 4th class citizens in what should have been their paradise. The ones who can’t have kids; Sometimes it’s their fault, but most times it isn’t. How do you really find a way to be happy through all of this? How do you wake up with purpose every morning when you discover 5years down the line that you should have married the one you said “No” to? When you discover that your husband is madly in love with another woman and is setting little traps for you so he can kick you out and replace you?…How are you supposed to deal with that? The one that just kills me is the death of a spouse. I have GREAT respect for young men and women that have lost the love of their life and still find a way to smile every day. If an ordinary break-up makes you feel like your world has stopped can you just imagine how horrible death would be? Imagine being in your early 40s with kids in secondary school and then you partner dies. People go around saying “it’s gonna be ok” but really it isn’t. What made me think of this? Most people don’t consider all these possibilities before they get married. Maybe if they realised that there are other ways a marriage could end apart from old age, people, girls especially, would be less inclined to rush into it just to wear a ring and answer a different name. It’s seriously SCARY stuff…I’ve taken a few steps back by just typing this article.
So marry someone who you are certain is worth it. When u cry if he or she dies, make sure that every time you remember your lives together it is with a huge smile. Make sure that the memories you make will help you endure the mourning period if it ever comes and that you are not filled with regret.

I want a husband and a house full of active kids. I want to know if my daughter will look like me or like a random family member we barely know; but in all this, I want to be able to sit down and remember my family in the middle of the day and smile. I don’t want to ever feel undue pain for even a second. God forbid we end up childless, but if I do, I’d want my husband and I to be so in love with each other that we’ll figure out a way to deal with it without hating each other. Every time I’d think of whatever pain life might have thrown at me, I’d like to be able to think of my husband and smile because I know that I am blessed.

Marriage should be fun, a merging of lives and sharing of souls there can be ups and downs but some things should not just happen. So marry the right person so that when all these random things happen you have something to fall back on.

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1 Response to "Untitled!!!"

*sigh* you are very right and very correct! It is really important. Marriage is so not a joke!

hmmm: I am intrigued which episode/season of DH did you watch?

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  • None
  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, "...no matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌

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