Posted on: 05/12/2011

It’s a word most people don’t like to use when referring to themselves but it’s a concept that’s very common amongst spinsters. You are closer to 30 than 20 and your mother has started calling you every Monday to know if you have met someone new. It’s getting worse now because the year is coming to an end and most of your peers are either getting engaged or planning their weddings. You tell yourself over and over again that it’s not really bugging you, but in the dead of night, those few minutes just before you fall asleep, you tell yourself the truth. You admit to yourself just how irritated you are that you are spending most of you savings on asoebi and travel expenses just to attend weddings of girls you feel you are 10times hotter than. You tell any available ear how wayward these girls were back in school and how life is so unfair….lol….nne you have become desperate. Men sense desperation and they don’t like it. Their initial instinct is either to run or take advantage. When a young boy, between the ages of 28 and 32 starts talking marriage the first time you guys sit to have a proper chat, that’s one of the signs that you might be sending the wrong signals. Trust me that dude isn’t thinking of marrying you just yet, but he’s bringing up that topic because he thinks that that’s what you wanna hear at that time. Next thing you know this girl is pampering him, cooking him meals or buying him meals…lol…fantasizing about their future together, getting detailed info about his village, parent’s occupation even his blood genotype. This is what I like to call “too much too soon”. You don’t even know if the dude is a wife beater or if he does drugs and yet you’ve picked out wedding rings? If that’s not desperation then I don’t know what is. Most times these guys will let you fool yourself, string you along, sleep with you and run for the hills. Can’t say I blame them. I’m closer to 30 than 20 so I sympathise with these unwed girls but like I always say, what makes you think marriage will solve all your problems? From where I’m standing I see that marriage comes with a whole new set of problems. It’s important to look at the positive side of being single. Doing what you want when you want it, you don’t answer to anyone. You still have your figure, it hasn’t been changed by child birth…lol…i know right now you are so lonely and all these things seem trivial, but 10years from now, when your husband doesn’t look so hot anymore any yet he still gets lustful stares whereas you chase unruly toddlers all over church and parties, you’ll wish for just 1 more day of spinsterhood. Ladies take your time, loneliness is like being horny if you are smart enough to wait it out you won’t do anything you’ll regret. Men are attracted to self-assured, self-efficient young women. Let your life be so busy that he’ll have to keep making himself available just in case you can squeeze him in between fun activities. I’m not saying you should turn into a party animal o, I’m just saying you should keep positively busy; work, gym, church, charity, occasional hang with platonic friends. This helps remove the stench of desperation.

Tell yourself this “I’m 30 and fabulous and the reason I’m still single is because my Spartan is yet to find me. xoxo


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  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, " matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌


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