theheartofmen

Complex

Posted on: 14/10/2011

A few minutes ago I was in the shower….which happens to be where I do a lot of my useful thinking, and it hit me….a lot of the problems we deep ourselves in are brought about by either a feeling of low self-esteem or too much self-esteem. We all have one thing about us, either physical or in our character that we are not confident about. In us women if it’s not our weight it’s our hair, skin colour, pimples, boob size, flabby stomach blah blah blah….for men it’s often times financial wahala or in some cases, their height. I wanna ask a question; who told us what is beautiful and what isn’t? How do we know that beautiful isn’t really ugly and vice versa? The lesson for this week is for both boys and girls alike….BUILD YOURSELF CONFIDENCE. If you are not comfortable with who you are nobody will ever really be comfortable with you. You can have all the work done on your body but if you don’t feel that satisfaction and contentment from within you are always going to feel incomplete. 10months ago I was chubby…yes I’m getting personal….lol…I couldn’t wear all the stuff I saw on tv and crap like that. I was (like most girls)self-conscious about my weight so I lost 12kilos in 6weeks…health wise that deathly dangerous but it felt damn good. But while I felt confident about wearing little shorts and tank tops, that didn’t solve anything…it only solved the outward appearance. I still sit up in the dead of the night and wonder if the mistakes I made will haunt me, will he ever ALL MINE and high school shit like that. So in essence we are always able to work on the outside but you’ll know you have achieved real greatness when you tackle the inside as well. Fact is we are all good enough for somebody. When I was chubby I had just as many (if not more) toasters as the new me. Some guys like a size 8 while other like a size 18, some guys love light-skinned girls while some will kill for a really dark girl. Some guys are into boobs, others are into hips and some like athletic girls. Some girls are 6ft tall and yet love their men shorter. Some girls are so financially stable that they just want a man to move into their live with nothing but his big heart. The key is to be comfortable and honest with who you are and not try to be someone else. Don’t think Felicia is better than you cos she wears a G-cup bra and you wear a B-cup, for all you know Felicia is secretly a call girl with the IQ of a walnut…..lol…and Felicia just cos you are not smart doesn’t mean you can make something better of yourself. So what if Asuquo drives a range and you jump okada….do you know he isn’t wanted by the FBI? Or better still how do you know that your hard work won’t pay off eventually? If you feel that you aren’t where you are meant to be in life wake up and smell the coffee my dear cos everyone feels that way about one thing or the other. Have you ever thought of the fact that not every1 was destined to be a Dangote. Not every girl was destined to end up in a man’s house, some will be successful single mothers some nuns, some are there to make money and take care of the world. I know it sound cruel but if we embrace these facts of life, we are bound to get depressed a lot less often. Work hard, tell God what you want, but also trust that He will lead you to your perfect destiny as long as you stay true to yourself and Him. Losing weight and robbing a bank will change the way the world sees you, but it won’t change the way you see yourself, it won’t give you that sense of self-satisfaction we all should have. When you have confidence you draw the right kind of people to you. It’s not proper to think you are better than anybody either because if you need to look down on people in order to feel good..then you are just as bad as the person that feels inferior.

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2 Responses to "Complex"

I can totally relate to this. Insecurity is a big issue in my life. There’s always something to be insecure about. If it’s not my weight, it’s my look or even my achievements or shd i say “unachievements” in life. It’s comforting knowing alot of ppl have similar insecurity problems. And I’m determined to rescue myself from my low self exteem life.

Intresting point

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  • None
  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, "...no matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌

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