theheartofmen

LESSON 2

Posted on: 06/09/2011

When is it Time to Walk Away?

By nature its a lot easier for women to say the words “its over”, “i can’t continue with this”, “i want out”….even when they don’t mean it causing their men to beg them….I think women believe these threats give them some sort of power but what I don’t get it if you love someone how can you think of walking away so many times?

Men on the other hand are structured differently, because they do not want to leave any woman hating them, rather than come out and say what they want, they pass signals…which in my own opinion is stupid but from my observation it works…who knows if that’s where Okafor’s law originated from…hmmmmm

Anyway today we’re going to try to decipher these signals so we ladies can know when to walk away with our dignity intact  because no matter how much they preach that women need to be submissive and blablabla , we need our pride.

1) Calls: I agree that we can’t always remain the way we started in a relationship, but I always ask myself this question….If in the beginning  he felt the need to run every detail of his day by me at every quarter of the day, now that he doesn’t do that anymore abeg who is he telling all that to? If a dude can answer this question then maybe I can change my line of thought…until then….My point is,men please start the way you want to finish, don’t put us on a pedestal and leave us hanging…At first you wouldn’t want to be a nag so you may not mention it but with time you will, and then you complain some more….but honey if your complaints are falling on deaf ears then its time to bow out…don’t give a speech just gently pull away….If he really wants you he will come running at your heels…if he doesn’t you’d have a little pride left.

2) Impatience: Women are eggs, we are to be pampered and treated like precious stones. If you have a man who knows this from day 1 then you are lucky but don’t relax too much oh….these people can change on you at any moment….1 of the clear signs of a man fed up with a relationship is when he starts to snap at you for little things…especially things you have been doing from day 1 eg: If you are the type that doesn’t make the bed when you wake up and in the beginning he used to tease you about it and one day he says “I’ve warned you about this carelessness”…omg…..wahala dey oh. It might just be stress from something else…but when these complaints get very frequent and the apologies take longer to come…the dude might be tired o…or he’s cheating…lmbo…choose 1.

3) The Family story:  “My family doesn’t want me to marry an igbo woman” didn’t you know when you were chasing me round Nigeria that I was igbo? When you were eating Nsala, Nkwobi, Ofe onugbu you didn’t know they were igbo delicacies abi? Or is it the fact that my name is Oby that threw you off? My dear he is just looking for an excuse to dump you and not take any blame for it. Same goes for “My family doesn’t agree with your background” or “I realised I can’t be with a girl who I can trace her relationship foot steps”…bullocks…

4) “Uncoded” Cheating: No man will want the woman he loves, or cares about at least, to find out he is being unfaithful so he goes to extra lengths to hide this fact from her. When you start catching a dude often and he does little or nothing extra to hide his indiscretions, he’s very likely trying to pass a message across.

We need to stop making excuses for these dudes…someone I used to know said to me once; “There is only one way to act if you care about someone.” At the time I told her that my boyfriend expressed himself differently…but now i know she was right. When you love/care for someone deeply, you bend over backwards to ensure that they don’t get hurt on your account. You often times put their needs above your own…

Don’t stick around a man who doesn’t want you and make him pity you and stick with you….you will be the one to regret it later(assuming he even stays).

LESSON 3: WHAT IS CLASSIFIED AS CHEATING?

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4 Responses to "LESSON 2"

Ds is very luvly nd fnx 4 dese words der are gonna be helpful to me… God bless

This is the only blog I have ever ever read from start to finish

Really interesting,sure is good piece for me to learn from.God bless.

Quite true..

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  • None
  • livelytwist: Interesting topic that we need to come to terms with. As you pointed out, "...no matter how much you miss your past, there’s a reason you left in th
  • angelsbeauty: Word!
  • Bee: Spot on 👌

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